No Heroics: ABC Say No

A US remake of ITV2's No Heroics has been turned down by ABC, after the filmed pilot failed to entice them into commissioning a full series. British creator Drew Pearce, who was helping craft the American remake, had this to say about the failure:

"... a pilot was shot. And it turned out really well, except for the whole 'not getting picked up' part. Though it's unlikely there'll ever be a legal way to see it. I don't actually think anything went wrong as such. I will say that it's probably not the best year to do a massive, cool, edgy, expensive single-camera genre-based network-comedy without huge starpower on a major American network. Kind of obvious, but true."

So, will a second series of the British original now go ahead?

"That's still up in the air. Hopefully we'll shoot it very soon. Turns out the ultimate nemesis a modern cape can face is the global economic downturn. Wait: somebody should make a comedy about that! Second-tier superheroes who can't get any work so they take sit around a pub talking about their crappy lives? That sounds awesome! All I need is a name, a group of characters and some extremely dirty jokes..."

No Heroics USA: Cast

Not many people watched ITV2's No Heroics last year (because it was on ITV2), but creator Drew Pearce probably doesn't care now, because he's helping Jeff Greenstein (Will & Grace) remake his superhero comedy for ABC. The new series retains the original's premise (a group of loser "capes" who frequent a bar in a world where superheroes are everywhere), but changes the characters and their powers.

In the US version, Freddie Prinze Jr (Scooby Doo) will play Bradley/Ultimatum, an "egotistical Alpa Male who has all the women and fame and money a guy could want"; Paul Campbell (Battlestar Galactica) plays Pete/Chillout, "a Canadian-born superhero who can freeze small objects"; Eliza Coupe (Scrubs) stars as a "bad girl who can turn invisible"; and Arielle Kebbel (The Grudge 2) is the "sweetheart" of the group.

Day Of The Triffids cast; Richard & Judy flop; Doctor Who salary; No Heroics USA; Witches Of Eastwick; Lost In Austen movie

The BBC's two-part remake of John Wyndham's Day Of The Triffids has attracted a stellar cast: Dougray Scott as hero Bill Masen, Joely Richardson, Brian Cox, Vanessa Redgrave, Eddie Izzard and Jason Priestly. The script has been written by Patrick Marber (Closer) and is now filming. The story concerns a world where the majority of the population have been blinded by a meteor shower, allowing walking carnivorous plants to slowly takeover.

Richard & Judy's New Position is likely to be axed by December, following its lowest ever viewing figures: a truly pathetic 8,000. That's a 90% decrease since R&J transferred to new digital channel Watch from Channel 4, with 100,000. The couple used to enjoy ratings of 3 million at Channel 4, but were lured to Watch because of a big pay-deal and more creative freedom. A recent change of timeslot from 8pm to 6pm doesn't seem to have helped matters, and the couple don't seem to have retained their Channel 4 audience. There is widespread speculation that Judy Finnegan will retire when New Position ends (to write books), leaving her husband to pursue a solo career.

Matt Smith is being paid £1 million for a three-year contract on Doctor Who, when he takes over as the Time Lord. David Tennant (who Smith is replacing) is reportedly on £1 million per year, so this new deal will save the BBC a lot of money.

ITV2's superhero comedy No Heroics is going to be remade by Will & Grace's Jeff Greenstein, who hopes to create an American pilot for ABC. The sitcom was mostly ignored in the UK (being a low-budget, minority channel project), but creator Drew Pearce could get the last laugh if his idea becomes a big hit in the States. Mind you, superhero comedies on television have a bad track record. The Tick, anyone?

And finally... veteran TV director David Nutter is helming the pilot of ABC's The Witches Of Eastwick adaptation; a fantasy drama about three women with supernatural abilities who summon the Devil to their sleepy town. The script has been written by Josh Friedman (who recently worked with Nutter on Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.) Nutter himself has become the go-to guy for television pilots in the States, having directed 14 that all got picked up for series.

Remember ITV1's Lost In Austen last year? The fantasy costume drama about a modern girl who is transported into the fictional universe of Jane Austen's Pride & Prejudice? Well, it seems you can't keep a good idea down for long. British director Sam Mendes (American Beauty) is developing a movie version, that he will produce. No word on casting yet, but wouldn't it be funny if Gemma Arterton (who appeared in the series, fairly briefly, as Elizabeth Bennett) is promoted to lead for the movie, in light of her post-Bond fame? Of will they get a loudmouth Yank to play the lead, for maximum fish-out-of-water potential?

NO HEROICS 1.6 - "Monkey Gone To Heaven"

Writer: Drew Pearce
Director: Ben Gregor

The final episode of this enjoyable (if never side-splitting) sitcom is even more downbeat than usual, owing to the unexpected death of ineffectual Fortress bouncer Thundermonkey...

Norse Dave (Steve Spiers) blames a villain called Doomball and asks for Timebomb's (James Lance) help to interrogating him for information in the pub cellar. I'm actually uncomfortable with recent revelations that Don's such an unsavoury character, although the Spaniard's ad hoc torture method (piercing Doomball's face with cheesy nibbles and forcing peanuts under his fingernails) was grimly funny and a very memorable visual.

Jenny/She-Force (Rebekah Staton) is lumbered with a rather bland storyline, where she takes to enforcing Thundermonkey's rules in his absence, and narrows her sights on a few drinkers breaking the cardinal "no smoking" rule. It's always good to see Adam Buxton as a guest-star, but this was pretty much filler material with an unsurprising direction.

More interesting was Alex/The Hotness (Nicholas Burns), who tries to impress an American agent keen to assemble a new superhero group in the US. Alex's new beard fails to impress, but the agent begins to suspect he'd be perfect as a British sidekick to be ridiculed. Tragically, the money and perks are strong enough for Alex to swallow his pride and agree to the job offer -- until he realizes he'd have to make a permanent move Stateside and leave ex-girlfriend Sarah/Electroclash (Claire Keelan) behind… and probably lose her forever to Devlin/Excelsor (Patrick Baladi).

Considering Alex and Sarah were two of the least interesting characters when No Heroics began, it's been nice to watch them develop into semi-rounded people -- simply by giving them a romantic history together. Burns is still slightly too broad compared to everyone else (an obvious "comedy character", if you like), but Keelan shows depth and subtlety in her reactions to Devlin's sledgehammer flirting and the prospect of losing Alex.

Simply for the Alex/Sarah storyline, this is one of the better episodes, although it's not quite as climactic as I'd have liked for a finale. The death of Thundermonkey wasn't really a big deal, because he was never more than mild comic-relief -- although I'm saddened we never got to see his simian-summoning power in action. The Alex/Sarah/Devlin love-triangle hasn't been as involving as it should have been, mainly because you just can't believe Sarah would ever sleep with such an egotistical bully. Baladi's been great fun and has given some rich performances, but Devlin's so unlikeable it's never been a worry he'd seriously come between Alex and Sarah -- unless the script forces the matter, as it did here.

Overall, this was a decent end to an unremarkable but sporadically amusing sitcom. No Heroics never really had the budget or writing quality to evolve beyond what it resembles (a sketch with the joke stretched to a total of 3 hours), but the committed performances and its commendable refusal to pander only to the geek crowd helped sustain my interest. If it comes back for another series, hopefully ITV2 will bless it with more production cash and wider publicity. More importantly, let's hope the number of laugh-out-loud gags gets a super-boost.


23 October 2008
ITV2, 10.35pm

Cast: Alex/The Hotness (Nicholas Burns), Sarah/Electroclash (Claire Keelan), Don/Timebomb (James Lance), Jenny/She-Force (Rebekah Staton), Devlin/Excelsor (Patrick Baladi) & Steve Spiers (Norse Dave)

NO HEROICS 1.5 - "Origin, Tonic"

Writer: Jon Brown
Director: Ben Gregor

Photo: Sam Gibley

The penultimate episode continues the Spaced mini-reunion (after last week's Mark Heap appearance) with Julia Deakin and Clive Russell playing the famous superhero parents of Sarah/Electroclash (Claire Keelan). While I've enjoyed the development of Claire and Alex/The Hotness (Nicholas Burns) recently, No Heroics' jokes are still too caustic for my taste. But, you take what you can with this sitcom…

Uncharacteristically, the most successful subplot belongs to Claire and Alex this week. Here, they pretend they're still in a relationship, because it pleases Claire to upset her disapproving father Barry. A nice level of comedy is maintained as Alex does his best to irritate and frustrate his potential in-laws at The Fortress, as Barry takes sanctuary with Devlin/Excelsor at the bar (Patrick Baladi) to mastermind an immature prank…

Meanwhile, Don/Timebomb (James Lance) attends a therapy group for troubled superheroes and generally disrupts the session with his candid opinions and quasi-psychology. The notion of a support group for superheroes is quite an obvious one, but there's still some comedy to be mined here -- but Saxondale did the same joke weekly, with greater success. The funniest thing about this subplot was the visual of primary-coloured "capes" sitting around in a circle with sombre expressions -- particularly from the overweight Praying Mantis (Tony Way).

Elsewhere, Jenny/She-Force (Rebekah Staton) tires of her superhero lifestyle and takes a job as regular office worker, attracting the attention of a male colleague. Unfortunately, unlucky-in-love Jenny soon realizes her admirer is a self-confessed "capist" who can't help telling disparaging "jokes" about superheroes…

Staton is as lovable as ever, and the idea that prejudice extends to superheroes in this parallel universe was quite interesting. Indeed, the episode misses a trick in not exploring that avenue. Imagine a world where prejudice is directed at people who are clearly "superior" to regular people. How would that work exactly? Is it all based on jealousy? I was disappointed we didn't get to attend one of the mentioned anti-cape rallies, too.

Actually, one of my overriding thoughts about No Heroics is how it contains a few good ideas, but never takes them to the obvious next level. It has the gritty, sexually-tinged, mordant humour down to a tea -- but everytime something fairly clever or controversial presents itself, it's not equipped or willing to carry it through. A whole episode using anti-superhero sentiment as an allegory for racial fear could have been clever, insightful and very funny -- but it's not long before we're chasing an easy laugh as Alex shits his trousers.

Overall, "Origin, Tonic" deserves credit for delivering a worthwhile storyline for Sarah and Alex (helped by the ever reliable Deakin and Russell), and there were moments in Don and Jenny's side plots that made me chuckle. I still find it hard to really love this series, but it sometimes throws a spark of life your way.


16 October 2008
ITV2, 10.30pm

Cast: Alex/The Hotness (Nicholas Burns), Sarah/Electroclash (Claire Keelan), Don/Timebomb (James Lance), Jenny/She-Force (Rebekah Staton), Devlin/Excelsor (Patrick Baladi), Clive Russell (Barry), Julia Deakin (Sarah's Mum), Simon/Thundermonkey (Jim Howick), Steve Spiers (Norse Dave) & Tony Way (Praying Mantis)

NO HEROICS 1.4 - "Back Issues"

Writer: Drew Pearce
Director: Ben Gregor

Cast: Nicholas Burns (Alex/The Hotness), Claire Keelan (Sarah/Electroclash), Patrick Baladi (Devlin/Excelsor), James Lance (Don/Timebomb), Rebekah Staton (Jenny/She-Force), Mark Heap (Lightkiller), Jim Howick (Simon/Thundermonkey) & Steve Spiers (Norse Dave)

I don't think we'll ever get a "eureka!" moment with this sitcom (when everything clicks and it provides a constant stream of laughs for 30-minutes), but there's enough to wryly chuckle over. This episode benefits from only dividing into three separate stories -- so only one disappoints, and the remaining two make the most of No Heroics' most appealing characters: Don/Timebomb (James Lance) and Jenny/She-Force (Rebekah Staton).

Sarah/Electroclash (Claire Keelan) and Alex/The Hotness (Nicholas Burns) are lumbered with the worst story, as they basically hang out together at The Fortress pub and try not to argue. It was interesting to get some insight on their failed relationship, but the venom being spat their way by the egotistical Devlin/Excelsor (Patrick Baladi) is just becoming tiresome now. It doesn't help that we're never shown Devlin in action as a superhero, so his constant belittling of Alex just irritates me. From what we've actually seen, Alex is the one with a cool superpower, and Devlin's just a vociferous bully.

Jenny has a nice enough story (well, more an extended scene), where she goes to the Superoffenders Unit to see her ex-boyfriend -- a supervillain she was forced to arrest called Light Killer (Spaced's Mark Heap). Heap is his usual twitchy self, given the episodes best lines and an amusingly meager power -- to turn off lights. Rebekah Staton should really get more to do, as she actually has a character with warmth and vulnerability. The aching cynicism of everyone else can be good for a few giggles, but No Heroics lacks characters you can genuinely like -- or even love-to-hate. Jenny fills that gap well, and I'd like to see more of her.

If it wasn't for Heap's mesmeric presence, Don would probably have the best subplot. Here, the dour sex-obsessive finally leaves The Fortress' confines and finds work as a bodyguard for a foulmouthed, homophobic boy prince from the Middle East. His scenes mostly take place in the back of a limo, brushing off the youngster's obscenities and using his 60-second precognition to protect the royal from assassination attempts. Quite a fun scenario, made memorable by the confident performance from the young actor playing the prince.

Overall, my thoughts remain the same about No Heroics: it has its moments, but it's ultimately too drab to make you laugh. It's not too shabby for an ITV2 sitcom of limited appeal and budget, but episodes generally breeze by and fail to spark.


9 October 2008
ITV2, 10.30pm

NO HEROICS 1.2 & 1.3 - "The Fantastic Chore" & "Mean Gills"

Writers: Drew Pearce (1.2) & Daniel Peak (1.3)

Director: Ben Gregor

Cast: Nicholas Burns (Alex/The Hotness), Claire Keelan (Sarah/Electroclash), Patrick Baladi (Devlin/Excelsor), James Lance (Don/Timebomb), Rebekah Staton (Jenny/She-Force), Jim Howick (Simon/Thundermonkey), Steve Spiers (Norse Dave), Joe Cornish (Power Hour Presenter, voice), Nick Mohammed (Ian), Alan Barnes (Scottish Drunk), Tom Basden (Fusebox), Tanya Fearon (Hoody Girl), Laurie Hagen (Uninterested Bus Girl), Ray Peacock (Darren), Wayne Powerdavis (Hoody Boy) & Tony Way (Praying Mantis)

Its jokes still evaporate from memory, but No Heroic's "The Fantastic Chore" was more amusing than the premiere -- if still too reliant on coarseness. However, the first episode not written by creator Drew Pearce, Daniel Peak's "Mean Gills", was a notable improvement in every respect -- wheedling out some decent laughs.

In "The Fantastic Chore", superwimp Alex/The Hotness (Nicholas Burns) is tipped off about a drugs bust, so he sets off to become a hero after boarding a bus to the crime scene -- using the journey time to flirt with a woman (Laurie Hagen), as two teenage hoodies antagonize him.

Meanwhile, Sarah/Electroclash (Claire Keelan) and Jenny/She-Force (Rebekah Staton) go to a convention for fans of their retired crime-fighting partnership -- the unfortunately-named "Ladytrouble". Finally, Don/Timebomb (James Lance) spends time alone in The Fortress pub, where he meets a fellow cape called Fusebox (Tom Basden) with the strange ability to fuse objects (and his own words) together.

Each vignette is more entertaining than anything going on last week, which helps "The Fantastic Chore" pass the time much easier. It was interesting to discover Sarah and Jenny were once a dynamic duo, and scenes of the girls fielding questions from a roomful of geeks (one with a life-sized cutout of Jenny, complete with a hole in its crotch) were good fun. Staton is already the most likeable presence, even if she hasn't done as much. And, while nobody does stroppy cynicism like Keelan, I hope she's not going to be so contemptuous all the time.

Alex's story was once again the least successful, as he's too drippy and pathetic to be appealing. He's the repressed opposite of Devlin/Excelsor (Patrick Baladi), there to be thwarted at every turn despite his best efforts. Burns is a likeable comic actor, but he looks a bit hamstrung by his character's utter insecurity and loser status. He's not a funny creation, just sad and tedious.

James Lance has the most interesting character (his deadpan expressions and miserable manner easing the fact he's the focus of most sex-based punchlines.) In "Mean Gills", Don agrees to take Alex to a seedy strip club (full of hot girls dressed as Wonder Woman), with the intention to cause a ruckus and earn himself a "bad boy" reputation in the press. Needless to say, all Alex succeeds in doing is looking like a bumbling idiot and upsets the staff.

Elsewhere, Claire is reprimanded by the Super Powers Authority for bad behaviour and given a delinquent sidekick as punishment (a bucktoothed teenager called Jackrabbit, who can cause localized earth tremours). Despite her initial reluctance, Claire begins to enjoy Jackrabbit's company and similarly anti-social temperament. This story worked well, mainly because Jackrabbit is twice as funny as any of the regular characters -- earning the show its first belly-laugh when he started vibrating in a booth. Hopefully he'll be back.

At The Fortress, Jenny is excited when a pool player begins flirting with her, although the smooth lothario's disgusting super power is an unfortunate turn-off. Staton again shows welcome vulnerability here, in contrast to her character's more cynical or self-obsessed friends. It was also rather sweet to discover her contempt for super powers because they just get in the way of a normal life. She's the Bridget Jones of superheroes, sort of.

Overall, "The Fantastic Chore" was a small improvement over "Supergroupie", and "Mean Gills" was undoubtedly the best episode yet. Hopefully this improvement will continue and No Heroics will find a winning comedy formula before it ends. Unfortunately, I still don't think any of the characters are particularly strong, the material slips into dumb vulgarity too often… and, most crucially, it's just nowhere near as funny as a superhero comedy should be. But I appreciate ITV2 giving this sitcom a whirl, and hopefully the depressing and miserable atmosphere will continue to clear.


25 September & 2 October 2008
ITV2, 10.30pm

NO HEROICS 1.1 - "Supergroupie"

Writer: Drew Pearce

Director: Ben Gregor

Cast: Nicholas Burns (Alex/The Hotness), Patrick Baladi (Devlin/Excelsor), Claire Keelan (Sarah/Electroclash), James Lance (Don/Timebomb), Rebekah Staton (Jenny/She-Force), Jim Howick (Simon/Thundermonkey), Steve Spiers (Norse Dave), Oliver Maltman (Doomball), Joe Cornish (Power Hour Presenter, voice), Josef Altin (Robber), Delroy Atkinson (Newsstand Vendor), Allun Corduner (Shopkeeper), Ginny Holder (TV Reporter) & Andrea Lowe (Vicci)

Dissecting comic-book superheroes and poking fun at their traditions is nothing new, but it's currently in vogue thanks to spandex capers like The Incredibles, Hancock, Heroes and next year's Watchmen. No Heroics is a sitcom existing in a parallel universe where superheroes are real and live amongst us, regularly saving humanity from disasters big and small. This being a British comedy (and a lowly ITV2 production) the potential is shrunk down considerably -- focusing on a small group of "capes" while they're off-duty drowning their sorrows at a pub called The Fortress, where using superpowers isn't permitted...

The five main characters are: Alex/"The Hotness" (Nicholas Burns), a loser who can wield fire; Sarah/"Electroclash" (Claire Keelan), an amoral woman who can command machinery; Don/"Timebomb" (James Lance), a miserable Spanish lothario who can see 60 seconds into the future; Jenny/"She-Force" (Rebekah Staton), an overweight single woman with super-strength; and Delvin/"Excelsor" (Patrick Baladi), a boastful egotist who's currently the city's most successful superhero.

"Supergroupie" does a decent job of laying out this parallel universe, realizing its natural audience will be au fait with this unoriginal concept. The show also places black-comedy at the forefront of things; not allowing the comic-book world to overshadow the laughs entirely. Budgetary restraints probably had a big role to play in that decision, but it opens up the series to a wider audience. But don't worry, this is definitely not an ensemble variation of BBC1's My Hero. There's swearing, sexual themes, even gun violence. While never shocking, it does deserve its late-night timeslot.

This opener's story was split between Alex and Sarah, with the former deciding to sleep with obsessed groupie Vicci (Andrea Lowe), despite the fact she's only interested in The Hotness' minor celebrity and has unusual bedroom demands. The latter's storyline had Sarah refusing to help a sexist shopkeeper (Allun Corduner) when a gun-toting youth decides to rob him. Beyond those stories, everything centres around The Fortress pub, where Don secretly used his precognition to help singleton Jenny chat up men. Along the way we also met doorman Simon/"Thundermonkey" (Jim Howick), who has the ridiculous ability to summon simians. Unfortunately, the nearest monkeys are usually hours away...

There were some nice ideas and amusing lines in "Supergroupie", but not enough to last the distance. The whole thing seemed like a 5-minute sketch unnecessarily stretched to half an hour, and only succeeded because everything was new. Now that we've met the characters and been given a flavour of what to expect, hopefully it'll keep developing so that future episodes remain fresh. Otherwise, it's difficult to imagine a superhero comedy sustaining the laughs if the majority of each episode takes place in a pub where superpowers aren't allowed.

Nathan Barley's Nicholas Burns plays another saddo loser, although Alex isn't ignorant of his own shortcomings. He's unfortunately the least interesting character, as he's such an obvious personality to use in a superhero comedy -- and that could pose a problem, as he's presented as the "main" character. Claire Keelan (Burns' Nathan Barley co-star, coincidentally) is more intriguing, as Sarah's dishonourable attitude is fun and dramatic in a superhero context. It's also inherently funny to see her speak like a '70s-era Cylon to open tills, and whatnot.

James Lance could prove to be the best character as the Spanish straight-talker, but Timebomb is pushed into the background for most of this episode. Rebekah Staton barely gets anything to do as super-strong Jenny, so judgment will have to be reserved for now. Finally, Patrick Baladi is genuinely unlikeable as the grossly conceited Devlin, but not actually very funny along with it.

Overall, I was expecting a total stinker, but No Heroics actually has some potential. The main problem with "Supergroupie" (ignoring the fact an ITV2 budget can't do the concept justice) is that it wasn't particularly funny. There were wry smiles and occasional giggles, but I'm not sure this sitcom will please a geeky crowd expecting bigger thrills and imagination, while offering something worthwhile for everyone else.

A general rule for a successful sitcom is to include limitations with the situation, so No Heroics' pub setting obeys that. But, it then begs the question: do you really want a superhero comedy revolving around depressed people drinking together in a boozer? If the series can branch into the real world a bit more (budget allowing) and ensure its characters are funny without relying on their superpower gimmicks, then ITV2 could have a little cult hit on their hands...

... but it's not airborne yet.


18 September 2008
ITV2, 10.30pm

No Heroics

Strange. This wasn't on my radar at all. No Heroics, a sitcom set in a world where practically everyone is a superhero. The series will focus on a bar frequented by off-duty superheroes like The Hotness, Electroclash, She-Force and Praying Mantis.

Reasons to be excited: (1) it stars some fairly talented people (Nicholas Burns and Claire Keelan from Nathan Barley; Patrick Baladi from The Office; James Lance from I'm Alan Partridge), (2) superheroes are white-hot right now, thanks to Heroes and The Dark Knight, (3) the above trailer looks quite amusing at times.

Reasons to be nervous: (1) it's created/written by an exec-producer of High Spirits With Shirley Ghostman and Lip Service, (2) it starts on 6 September and nobody's even heard about it 'till now, (3) it's on ITV2, (4) superhero spoofs are unoriginal and quite predictable, (5) it's on ITV2.

Still, worth checking out. I think. The jokes in the trailer are quite "obvious"... but the effects look half-decent, the costumes are appropriately naff, James Lance actually looks pretty funny, and at least it's fresh content for ITV2. Did I mention it's on ITV2?