2012: Box Office Armageddon

In the US: Roland Emmerich's fetishist disaster movie 2012 explodes into the chart at #1 with an impressive $65m (that's $19,000 at every cinema it was screening at), so looks on course to earn back its $200m budget... and festival darling PRECIOUS debuts at #3, and will likely drift downwards... also, PIRATE RADIO (aka The Boat That Rocked) proved to be a hopeless flop for Richard Curtis, debuting at #11 with a terrible $2.9m...

US TOP 10

(-) 1. 2012 $65.2m
(1) 2. A Christmas Carol $22.3m
(-) 3. Precious: Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire $5.87m
(3) 4. The Men Who Stare At Goats $5.86m
(2) 5. This Is It $5.08M
(4) 6. The Fourth Kind $4.61m
(7) 7. Couples Retreat $4.16m
(5) 8. Paranormal Activity $4.04m
(8) 9. Law Abiding Citizen $3.8m
(6) 10. The Box $3.16m

In the UK: Likewise, everyone flocks to see 2012 here in the UK, which makes a huge £6.4m after just one week... and Michael Caine scores a surprise hit with vigilante drama HARRY BROWN, in at #3...

UK TOP 10

(-) 1. 2012 £6.4m
(1) 2. A Christmas Carol £2.5m
(-) 3. Harry Brown £1.2m
(3) 4. Up £985k
(4) 5. The Men Who Stare At Goats £796k
(6) 6. Fantastic Mr. Fox £675k
(1) 7. This Is It £475k
(5) 8. The Fourth Kind £428k
(9) 9. An Education £202k
(7) 10. Jennifer's Body £181k

UK RELEASES THIS WEEK

GLORIOUS 39

Romantic drama. A mysterious tale set around a traditional British family on the eve of World War Two.
Director: Stephen Poliakoff Starring: Romola Garai, Bill Nighy, Julie Christie, David Tennant, Juno Temple & Eddie Redmayne
Tomatometer: 54% (Fresh; based on 13 reviews)

THE INFORMANT!

Crime comedy. The U.S. government decides to go after an agri-business giant with a price-fixing accusation, based on the evidence submitted by their star witness, vice president turned informant Mark Whitacre.
Director: Steven Soderbergh Starring: Matt Damon, Scott Bakula, Lucas McHugh Carroll, Rusty Schwimmer, Eddie Jemison, Tom Papa & Rick Overton
Tomatometer: 76% (Fresh; based on 174 reviews) "A charismatic turn by star Matt Damon and a consistently ironic tone boost this quietly funny satire about a corporate whistle-blower."

THE TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON

Fantasy drama. After Bella recovers from the vampire attack that almost claimed her life, she looks to celebrate her birthday with Edward and his family...
Director: Chris Weitz Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Billy Burke, Taylor Lautner, Ashley Greene & Michael Sheen
Tomatometer: 30% (Rotten; based on 121 reviews) "The Twilight Saga's second instalment may satisfy hardcore fans of the series, but outsiders are likely to be turned off by its slow pace, relentlessly downcast tone, and excessive length."

A SERIOUS MAN

Comedy drama. A black comedy set in 1967 and centred on Larry Gopnik, a Midwestern professor who watches his life unravel when his wife prepares to leave him because his inept brother won't move out of the house.
Director: Ethan Coen & Joel Coen Starring: Michael Stuhlbarg, Richard Kind, Fred Melamed, Sari Lennick, Aaron Wolff, Jessica McManus & Peter Breitmayer
Tomatometer: 86% (Fresh; based on 154 reviews) "Blending dark humor with profoundly personal themes, the Coen brothers deliver what might be their most mature -- if not their best -- film to date."

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You probably know by now that Chuck's back on 10 January 2010 in the US, but have you seen the four-minute preview of season 3 (above)? It's basically a heartfelt thanks from star Zachary Levi (regarding the "Save Chuck" campaign that gave the spy-comedy a reprieve), together with a preview of one scene, held together by clips demonstrating how proactive and "superhuman" Chuck will be now he can be granted specialist skills. There's Casey as a barman, Chuck playing guitar, and Sarah dancing in a little blue dress. What more do you want? Chuck it out!

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[SPOILERS] It's a good sign that Misfits' second episode chose to focus on impertinent Nathan (Robert Sheehan), the only member of the fivesome without any actual super-powers (well, that he's aware of), as it proves the show doesn't need to rely on its superhero credentials to entertain us. Even better, this week's story actually had something poignant and twistedly funny to share about Nathan, and teenage attitudes to the elderly in general...

The "misfits" are taken by probation worker Sally (Alex Reid) to assist and entertain the residents of a nursing home, who appear to spend most of their days slow-dancing in near-silence. Telepath Kelly (Lauren Socha) finds her ability to read minds come in useful when dealing with taciturn old men who wants cup of tea, but Nathan is more distracted by gorgeous blonde volunteer Ruth (Amy Beth Hayes), whom he starts a lustful relationship with back at her grandmother's house. In one of many amusing sequences, Nathan and Ruth have sex on a sluggish stair-lift on their way upstairs to a bedroom, before Nathan learns the awful truth mid-coitus when youthful, buxom Ruth is transformed into a climaxing, wrinkled 83-year-old woman! It's Jack Nicholson's nauseating smooch with an old hag in The Shining, given an American Pie twist.

It turns out Ruth was affected by the thunderstorm that rolled across town, as it granted her a desire to be young again -- setting up the likelihood that other people in Misfits' universe have been blessed/cursed with extraordinary abilities -- meaning we have a readymade supply of "supers" to meet, befriend or defeat, a la Smallville. Indeed, a subplot concerned Nathan's would-be stepdad Jeremy being spotted running around the streets naked at night -- bizarre behaviour Nathan believes is evidence of a "perversion" he can use to get rid of his mother's new boyfriend, before realizing Jeremy's likewise been transformed by the storm into believing he's a yapping Jack Russell.

Ultimately, this episode was all about Nathan developing maturity in how he deals with old people and his mother's need for a relationship. Commendably, there wasn't a radical transformation of opinion in the boy (he still ran a mile when craggy Ruth approached him on a Zimmer frame), and his acceptance of Jeremy was still grudging, but that made it all the more believable. Credit too for writer Howard Overman taking a dark turn, as Nathan eventually got over the pain of beautiful Ruth lying to him (or rather the disappointment she's old enough to be his great-grandmother), only to find her dead in her armchair when he came over to apologize -- a photo album chronicling her early life by her side. Still, at least Nathan gave Ruth a few days of good memories and a feeling of being wanted, which is pretty much what the probation office hoped would be achieved. It's quite a delight to have a superhero drama where a "mission" reflects real-world generational concerns of modern times.

Unusually, both of the main subplots both revolved around the same charater, so everyone else only had a few choice scenes and moments to leave an impression. We saw that Simon (Iwan Rheon) has an internet chat-buddy who is refusing to send him photos of herself, and that someone knows the group killed their previous probation worker and is now taunting them via flyers stuck to the inside of their lockers. Beyond that, there wasn't much going on to get excited about, although I'm enjoying how the writing manages to undercut your instinctual reactions to certain developments -- best evidenced here by the derision everyone shows when a clichéd "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID" flyer was discovered. The best thing about Misfits right now is how the characters all act more realistically than their coevals on Heroes (where the writing would undoubtedly have ensured Nathan planted a kiss on dead Ruth's cheek), and the amount of acerbic putdowns, profanity and nudity goes some way to giving Misfits the edginess its smallscreen, American contemporaries lack.


19 November 2009
E4, 10pm

written by: Howard Overman directed by: Tom Green starring: Antonia Thomas (Alisha), Lauren Socha (Kelly), Nathan Stewart-Jarrett (Curtis), Iwan Rheon (Simon), Robert Sheehan (Nathan), Alex Reid (Sally), Amy Beth Hayes (Ruth) & Nicholas Burns (Police Officer)

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Two highly-anticipated premiere dates have been announced! First, NBC's Chuck starts its third season on Sunday 10 January 2010 with a double-bill, then moves immediately to its regular slot on Monday 11 January at 8pm. This means fans have a three-episode, two-day extravaganza to get them totally Chuck'd up*. For British fans, Virgin1 have yet to announce their plans, but the announcer did claim Chuck will be back in "the new year" over the credits of season 2's finale, so they hopefully won't be too far behind the US.

Secondly, ABC's Lost returns for its sixth and final season on Tuesday 2 February with a two-hour premiere at 9pm. For British fans, it's likely Sky1 will start showing Lost on Sunday 7 February (as that's what tends to happen), but nothing has actually been announced yet.

* It's also been confirmed that NBC have asked for 19 episodes, up from 13.

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It's competition time... yes, again! To celebrate the UK release of Terminator Salvation on 23 November, I have one copy of the film to give away to a lucky reader, on DVD or Blu-ray. Even better, the Blu-ray option includes a life-size T-600 skull to store your discs in, worth about £60 in the shops! So what are you waiting for? Read on for details about how you could win...

To enter this contest, just tell me (in no more than 84 words):

If a cyborg from the future came back in time to kill you, how would you terminate it?

Send your entries to my inbox (not in the comments section below). The competition closes on 23 November 2009 @6pm (GMT). Full terms and conditions for this competition can be read below:

Terms & Conditions

• By entering this competition, all entrants agree to be bound by the terms and conditions specified below.
  
  
• Only entries made via e-mail will be deemed valid; one entry per person.
  
  
• This competition is only open to residents of the United Kingdom and Ireland aged 12 and above, who have not previously won a competition organized by Dan's Media Digest (hereafter DMD).
  
  
• If, for any reason, I deem an entry to be invalid/incomplete/illegible, that entry will be disqualified.
  
  
• Submissions should be original work.
  
  
• The closing date for entries is 23 November 2009 at 6:00pm (GMT). All late entries will be discounted.
  
  
• The winner will be revealed at DMD (danowen.blogspot.com) on 24 November 2009. The winner will then be contacted by e-mail within 24-hours and asked to provide a delivery address and answer any pertinent questions.
  
  
• The winner and runners-up will be selected from entrants at my discretion. My decisions are final and not open to appeal or debate.
  
  
• The names of the winner and runners-up may be used in publicity materials and events relating to this competition. DMD does not accept any obligations of confidence towards an entry or entrant.
  
  
• DMD is entitled to terminate/modify these terms and conditions at its discretion and at any time.
  
  
• By submitting an entry the entrant will be licensing DMD to use the content at its discretion for any purpose deemed appropriate.
  
  
• By submitting an entry the entrant takes full responsibility for ensuring that the rights of all contributions to the work have been properly acquired.
  
  
• Affiliates or employees of Sony Pictures are not allowed to enter. Any entries received of a suspicious nature or origin will be disqualified.
  
  
• DMD will not disclose any e-mail or delivery addresses to third parties. Only the winner's home/work address will be made known to the supplier of the prize, for delivery reasons.
  
  
• Delivery of the prize is beyond the control of DMD, but should take no longer than five working days (unless there are problems with the postal service, such as a Royal Mail strike.)
  
  
• If the winner has not received their prize one week after the competition closed, they are permitted to enquire about its whereabouts with DMD by e-mail. If the suppliers of the prize insist the item has been posted, the matter will be considered dealt with to avoid fraudulent claims of missing goods.
  

If you have any questions, just ask in the comments section below. In the meantime, why not check out Terminator Salvation's UK website that features a 3D game?

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The dark comedy Psychoville, the brainchild of League Of Gentlemen members Reese Shearsmith and Steve Pemberton, has been recommisioned for a Christmas special and another six-part series next year -- following its success earlier this summer, where it attracted an average of 1.7 million viewers every Thursday. Read more here.

I'm torn about this news, because I thought the way Psychoville "ended" was a big disappointment and felt unearned because we'd been led to believe the show was a self-contained "miniseries". I'm certainly not convinced the existing characters have mileage to last another series, so I'd be more excited if Psychoville had completed its story and we were being promised a new tale with different characters.

Of course, there are strong rumours that Pemberton and Shearsmith only included a divisive cliffhanger to try and provoke the BBC into greenlighting a second series, so they have every intention of wiping the slate clean. Hopefully this means the Christmas special will tie-up the loose-ends from series 1's finale, and we'll get a new assortment of grotesques to follow in 2010.

What do you think? Are you excited for more, whatever happens, or are you hesitant because of how series 1 ended?

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[SPOILERS] I was right, the BBC sneaked out Defying Gravity's sixth episode late on Saturday without telling anyone, but this fact didn't elude my trusty digibox -- although I'm still wondering if the joke's actually on me. The midway point of space-soap Defying Gravity had even more of a clinical feel than usual, as we gained some insight into Dr. Mintz (Eyal Podell) after Paula (Paula Garcés) became the victim of a workplace accident while loading (weightless) containers. Where there's blame there's a claim..?

Again, the flashbacks were on-hand to illuminate decisions and reponses the crew make when dealing with any given crisis. "Bacon" was a medically-focused episode, revealing that Donner (Ron Livingstone) can't stand the sight of blood, that Zoe (Laura Harris) terminated her pregnancy and fell sick because of an ovarian cyst, and that Mintz's hallucinations of a little girl trapped under rubble is a repressed memory of wartime horror. The problem with the flashbacks is that there's never much doubt about what's going to happen in them (it's evident nobody will die or fail to get picked for the mission), and we can construe a lot from people's interactions aboard Anthares without needing a flashback to confirm things.

Still, there was mild fun in seeing someone cut their thumb off in zero-gravity, leading to thousands of blood droplets suspended in the air that had to be sucked up by vacuum cleaner, and I quite enjoy the glimpses of 2052's technology and culture (a recreational drug exists that's totally undetectable, for e.g.) But it's all trimmings to what was ultimately a thin episode that didn't have the guts to surprise you. I had my fingers crossed that Paula would die, if only to see how the crew would handle that tragedy -- particularly Wassenfelder (Dylan Taylor), who blamed himself for her accident. And how would they have dealt with the body -- put it on-ice until they return home for a proper funeral, or launch her into space? We'll never know, as everything was wrapped up too neatly and Mintz saved the day.

It's never a good sign when you find yourself intrigued by imagined alternatives to the story being presented, is it.


14 November 2009
BBC2/BBC HD, 10.40pm

written by: Meredith Lavender directed by: Marcie Ulin starring: Ron Livingston (Maddux Donner), Malik Yoba (Ted Shaw), Andrew Airlie (Mike Goss), Paula Garcés (Paula Morales), Florentine Lahme (Nadia Schilling), Karen LeBlanc (Eve Weller-Shaw), Ty Olsson (Rollie Crane),Eyal Podell (Dr. Evram Mintz), Maxim Roy (Claire Dereux), Dylan Taylor (Steve Wassenfelder), Christina Cox (Jen Crane) & Laura Harris (Zoe Barnes)

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[SPOILERS] The V's get visa's in this penultimate episode before the show's enforced hiatus until spring, and "A Bright New Day" certainly managed to make me feel more comfortable about this infant show. There was a more confident direction, the story advanced plenty, lots of new information was imparted, and there was even a twist that surprised me. It wasn't enough to be considered a complete turnaround, as it's still a shame many of the characters are dull, but this was the best episode yet...

It was good to see a plausible ramification of the V's arrival being tackled here, as a woman called Mary Faulkner (Michelle Harrison) became the figurehead for an anti-V movement, as many people's relatives have died as a result of giant spaceships suddenly arriving overhead. I mean, men crash cars when a new Wonderbra billboard is erected, so there must have been a fair few accidents when flying saucers descended from the sky. As usual, Anna (Morena Baccarin) is keen to nip this problem in the bud as Mrs. Faulkner starts to gather support and riots breakout (not helped by the controversial decision to grant aliens visa's*), so she rehearses the perfect speech to win over this influential detractor.

Rebel alien Ryan (Morris Chestnut) tries to reassemble an old anti-V cell by finding resistant member Georgie (David Richmond-Peck) via his fellow rebel Cyrus -- who turns traitor and alerts the V's to Ryan's presence. It appears the V's would want to "reconnect" rogue Ryan, and reference is later made to something called "The Bliss" that all V's desire. Erica (Elizabeth Mitchell) and Father Jack (Joel Gretsch) had an early conversation where the priest asked a welcome burning question -- why don't the super-advanced V's just annihilate everyone? -- and Erica theorizes that the V's must need humans for something...

So, armed with with these nuggets of information, here's my educated guess: the V's weren't lying when they said they need a valuable resource that's abundant on Earth, but it's actually something biochemical that humans produce. In an echo of Torchwood: Children Of Earth, do the V's basically want to harvest a narcotic from human bodies? "The Bliss" sounds like something all the V's can "connect" to and get high on, which is therefore a pleasure rebel V's like Ryan have turned their back on for moral reasons. The V's have basically arrived to cultivate a global poppy field. All of this is just personal speculation right now, but I wouldn't be surprised if this is the direction we're headed. V doesn't strike me as a show that's genuinely going to mine new sci-fi territory, rather recycle very old ideas and give them fresh paint jobs.

Anyway, Erica is called in to protect the V's after they receive a death threat, and uses the access she's granted to snoop on the V's while she plays bodyguard. She finds a surveillance room that proves how every chest strip on the V's signature jackets contain an undetectable camera, broadcasting real-time feeds to the motherships. Eventually, Erica manages to stop the assassin who's been targeting V diplomats from carrying out his hit, and is congratulated for her good work -- although it's later revealed that the assassin was himself an alien playing a role to engender sympathy.

Erica's son Tyler (Logan Huffman) is growing closer to alien Lisa (Laura Vandervoort), who is now able to walk freely around New York and go on a proper date with him to a pizzeria because of her visa. She's also pulling strings to get him back on the Peace Ambassador Program (unfortunate acronym, that), and makes the male demographic cheer by stripping down to her underwear in Tyler's bedroom when Erica bursts in, rather than be caught wearing her V uniform. In a latter scene, it's made clear that Lisa is Anna's daughter, and her interest in Tyler is purely to accomplish a mission -- which I'm going to presume involves seeing if V's can procreate with humans. Okay, threat of lizard-babies, be damned -- where do I sign up?

Last week's climax revealed that dough-faced Dale (Alan Tudyk), an alien who's spent seven years working undercover with Erica as her partner, has been restored to health aboard the NYC mothership. Unfortunately, the blow to his head has resulted in him losing his memory, but he's nursed back to health and the V's use a form of cognitive "virtual reality" to stir up Dale's memories. Along the way he lets slip that there's another undercover V at the FBI building where he worked, and there's a good twist after Dale remembers that Erica knows the truth, only for the doctor he's confided in to reveal himself as a rebel V -- part of the so-called "Fifth Column" -- who then kills Dale by lethal injection now he knows his rebellion have a human ally.

Overall, "A Bright New Day" showed the same pace as the hurried pilot, but it all felt more controlled and necessary. A few of my concerns were tackled and the writers did a good job dropping breadcrumbs to follow -- such as the name of resistance folk hero John Mays. The final scene had Erica and Father Jack meeting Ryan and Georgie for the first time, so we'll hopefully start to see a more cohesive battleplan being drawn up about how to expose and defeat the V's. I'm still not convinced that V '09 has much to offer anyone familiar with its '80s progenitor or the abundance of alien invasion shows (like TV's War Of The Worlds sequel with Adrian Paul), but those unfamiliar are probably enjoying it, and this episode was definitely an entertaining one.


17 November 2009
ABC, 9/8c

written by: Diego Gutierrez & Christine Roum directed by: Fred Toye starring: Elizabeth Mitchell (Erica Evans), Morris Chestnut (Ryan Nichols), Joel Gretsch (Father Jack Landry), Lourdes Benedicto (Valerie Holt), Logan Huffman (Tyler Evans), Laura Vandervoort (Lisa), Morena Baccarin (Anna), Scott Wolf (Chad Decker), Michelle Harrison (Mrs. Falkner), Roark Critchlow (Paul Kendrick), Michael Filipowich (Cyrus), Mark Hildreth (Joshua), Britt Irvin (Haley Stark), Tyler McClendon (Steven), David Richmond-Peck (Georgie), Christopher Shyer (Marcus), Alan Tudyk (Dale Maddox) & Jesse Wheeler (Brandon)

* It's a bit of a slap in the face if you're human and struggle to get one, no?

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I wish Channel 4 wouldn't commission full series of pilots in their Comedy Showcase season before they've aired. A big part of the fun is the belief (however mistaken) that audience reaction plays a part in dictating what becomes a "proper" show. Last week, PhoneShop was picked up by E4 the day its pilot was broadcast, and now Channel 4 have ordered a full series of Pete V Life (about a man whose life is narrated by sports commentators), and it won't even get to air its Comedy Showcase pilot -- which is probably for the best. The five-part Pete V Life will arrive on our screens in May 2010.

In related news, it's been confirmed that the sitcom Plus One (which was born from last year's Comedy Showcase) has been axed. It's a shame in many ways, as I really enjoyed it, but admittedly the premise didn't lend itself to more than one series. It's hard to see how they'd have justified another series, particularly with a title that restricts the show so badly.

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The subject header says it all, really. Virgin1 are increasing their US drama lineup with Syfy's Warehouse 13 (about two secret service agents tracking down supernatural objects) and NBC's medical drama Trauma. Virgin1 will show season 1 of Warehouse 13 (which has already aired on The Sci-Fi Channel in the UK), and have the first-run rights to season 2.

Amy Barham, Virgin Media TV's Head Of Acquisitions:

"Trauma's incredibly high production values and high-octane action coupled with the quirky, fun and imaginative world of Warehouse 13 help give Virgin 1 a really strong line-up for next year."

I can't say I'm impressed by these purchases. Warehouse 13 was so bad I didn't make it through the pilot episode, and the 13-part Trauma has already been cancelled in the States. Surely it would have made more marketing sense for Virgin to buy... V, for obvious reasons?

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[SPOILERS] I'm not sure how long I'm going to continue with reviews of Defying Gravity. It's taken me five days to get around to watching this fifth episode and, despite the fact the announcer claimed it won't be back for two weeks, my digibox recorded an episode that aired late on Saturday (which I assume is the sixth episode), so are the BBC in a hurry to burn this show off now? Or has my box recorded a repeat, silly thing.

"Rubicon" wasn't a terrible episode, comparatively speaking. It's just that Defying Gravity's the kind of show where blondes answer the door with tubs of Häagen-Dazs, and mothers use Tarot cards to pry into their daughter's love-lives. There's also a drinking game in how many times characters say "nominal" on this show! I started to notice that quirk a few weeks ago. It's like the writers have no deep knowledge of space terminology, but they've latched onto that word as something that sounds authoritative and realistic. Oddly, "nominal" means "ostensible", "titular" or "insignificant" in my thesaurus, but is bandied around as meaning "normal" here. Maybe the word takes on fresh meaning in the mid-21st century.

I quite liked how the flashbacks revolved around personal possessions the characters felt attached to, which were later put into a time-capsule aboard Antares to mark the "point of no return" for their mission (a.k.a "Rubicon"), and it seems that the visions Donner (Ron Livingstone) is experiencing can be quite helpful, as he hallucinates Martian dust on equipment that proves to be faulty. So is this "Beta" cargo they're unwittingly carrying not quite as malevolent as we'd been led to believe? It was also a nice twist that footage of the tragic Mars mission came to light that proves Donner's nemesis Mike Goss (Andrew Airlie) was responsible for the misfortune -- because he lost his cool under pressure -- but he's hidden the video evidence and pinned the blame on Donner. The scoundrel.

So yes, there are a few bright moments, but it's still a very drippy television show. I can't see sci-fi fans really enjoying it because things are quite clichéd, nor can I imagine the target demographic of young women choosing to watch it purely for the relationships (which are the least compelling thing about Defying Gravity). It's a syrupy mess, really, but brainless entertainment if you have 43-minutes to kill and a tolerance for irksome dialogue and daft voice-overs. And I'm still intrigued about this "Beta" thing, God help me.

This show doesn't get many comments here -- so is anyone watching, or am I the lone viewer?


12 November 2009
BBC2/BBC HD, 9pm

written by: Meredith Lavender & Marcie Ulin directed by: Marcie Ulin starring: Ron Livingston (Maddux Donner), Malik Yoba (Ted Shaw), Andrew Airlie (Mike Goss), Paula Garcés (Paula Morales), Florentine Lahme (Nadia Schilling), Karen LeBlanc (Eve Weller-Shaw), Ty Olsson (Rollie Crane),Eyal Podell (Dr. Evram Mintz), Maxim Roy (Claire Dereux), Dylan Taylor (Steve Wassenfelder), Christina Cox (Jen Crane) & Laura Harris (Zoe Barnes)

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E4 recently bought Fox's musical "dramedy" Glee, and they're going to mirror a tactic used in the US to build audience interest in the show, by premiering the pilot early (mid-December) and hoping positive buzz will make the series a hit when it starts in January. I reviewed the pilot here (which I really enjoyed), and I've seen episode 2 (which was pretty good, too), so I daresay I'll be doing weekly reviews at E4's pace for 2010. Well, until it starts to bore me, which it hopefully won't do.

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[SPOILERS] I never thought we'd get an episode that reintroduced Mohinder (Sendhil Ramamurthy) and actually made me feel reasonably pleased he's back. I'll probably grow to hate him all over again once his pretentious voice-overs resume, or he's easily tricked into helping the villains, but for now his role actually made sense and helped disperse the cloud of mystery surrounding Samuel (Robert Knepper)...

But first, Nathan (Adrian Pasdar) and Peter (Milo Ventimiglia) were told by The Haitian (Jimmy Jean-Louis) to look inside a shipping container across town, which was being used to store the dead body of the real Nathan -- complete with ugly stitching across his slashed neck. But, wait, wasn't Nathan's body burned on that bonfire at the end of season 3, with everyone gathered around to pay their respects? Oh, it seems not. Another case of a Heroes retcon, I suppose. Ignore all that, a commenter cleared up my confusion. Read on, nothing to see here...

Anyway, this bizarre discovery still isn't enough for Nathan to realize what's been happening to him, but when the Petrelli's hear about Matt's (Greg Grunberg) critical condition in hospital, they literally fly to his bedside and get some clearer answers. Peter used his restorative touch to heal Matt's gunshot injuries, unaware that he's delivered his brother (well, Sylar's body made to look like Nathan) to the Sylar residing in Matt's mind. It's amazing this stuff doesn't confuse me these days! Matt has regained control of his body following his brush with death and blurts out the truth to Nathan when he's revived (rather inexplicably, given how big a secret this all is), before Sylar takes over and tries to lure Nathan into touching him so they can become whole. And they do, indeed, accidentally touch -- but it appears that Sylar's transference into his own body doesn't result in instant reunification, as Nathan's psyche still has control.

An equally significant story shed light on exactly what Mohinder's been up to since the end of season 3. It turns out he moved back to India to become a teacher and has another beautiful girlfriend in tow, but he can't let go of the past -- symbolized by the fact he's kept his father's '60s research material from Coyote Sands. After playing an old film reel, Mohinder is intrigued by scratchy footage of his father Chandra's (Ravi Kapoor) fears about a newborn baby called Samuel, who appears able to draw on the power of other "specials" in the vicinity to boost his own ability. As Coyote Sands is an internment camp for dozens of people with special abilities, this means the infant's already responsible for a series of frightening earthquakes.

Mohinder is worried that such a person exists as an adult in the world -- as he could theoretically increase his power a thousand-fold in the right company -- so he tracked down the Sullivan Brothers' circus and met with Samuel's elder brother, Joseph -- a man who knows his sibling's dangerous potential, but has kept the truth hidden from Samuel for over 40 years. In the present, Samuel sends Hiro (Masi Oka) back in time to steal the film reel from Mohinder, seconds before it was destroyed to keep the secret safe. Hiro reluctantly obliges, so Samuel will tell him where his girlfriend Charlie's been hidden, but also uses his ability to prevent Mohinder's death when past-Samuel killed him for seemingly destroying the footage. There was even some welcome logic with the time-travel for once, as Hiro ensured the reprieved Mohinder can't now interfere with the timeline (as the past eight weeks of history could be riskily altered now Mohinder's alive to affect things), so he found a way to get him locked-up in a mental asylum for a few months.

With so much good work being done across the season's two main storylines, you may perhaps have expected the third subplot to be a tiresome bore, but it was actually quite an entertaining bridge towards better things. Here, Tracy (Ali Larter) went to Mr. Bennet's (Jack Coleman) looking for help, because her ability is becoming difficult to control and causing mayhem. Unfortunately, Bennet's not home, but Claire (Hayden Panettiere) is around and offers to try and help -- leading to some female bonding, semi-nakedness in a hot bath tub, and the comical scene of Claire being accidentally frozen solid and losing a foot. It's later revealed that Tracy is giving serious consideration to Samuel's offer of safe haven at his carnival, as the stresses of living amongst normal people is having an adverse effect on her capacity to control her power.

My usual practice when writing reviews is to never read anyone else's until my own has been posted online, then see if my thoughts and feelings were echoed by the majority of critics/fans. But there's a mosaic of opinion when it comes to Heroes. There are some reviews that savagely rip apart everything it does, others bow at the altar of season 1 but hate everything since then, others appear to have disliked the show since the very start (and now feel vindicated in their early hatred), some enjoy it as unchallenging entertainment, and others truly love what season 4's been doing.

I tend to agree with a wide variety of points all the critics make about Heroes -- it will always be known as the show that unnecessarily flushed away its own success, it writes itself into too many corners, it's not very logical when you pick it apart, its own rules are so silly that they undo any sense of drama (particularly when people "die"), but... I have to say that season 4 has been a lot better than it had any right to be. It's still too slow and awkward at times, plus it lacks big action moments (have NBC put their foot down over the budget, which proved unmanageable last year?), but "Brother's Keeper" seemed to prove that there's a coherent sweep of narrative beneath the surface.

Hey, the new information about Samuel's hazardous potential might even explain the future Hiro visited in season 3, where the planet was seen literally splitting apart. Is it all coming together?


16 November 2009
NBC, 9/8c

written by: Rob Fresco & Mark Verheiden directed by: Bryan Spicer starring: Jack Coleman (Mr. Bennet), Hayden Panettiere (Claire Bennet), Adrian Pasdar (Nathan Petrelli), Zachary Quinto (Sylar), Milo Ventimiglia (Peter Petrelli), Greg Grunberg (Matt), Benjamin Fitch (Officer Ramsey), Jimmy Jean-Louis (The Haitian), Ravi Kapoor (Young Dr. Chandra Suresh), Aleene Khoury (Student), Robert Knepper (Samuel Sullivan) & Kavi Ladnier (Mira Shenoy)

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The modern world advances at a lightning pace, and in no other area is that more apparent than domestic technology. But, there are some who refuse to join the 21st-century and instead stick to old-school technology. So, are you still playing vinyl records? Do you use video+ to record things? Is your phone a Nokia 8310? Or worse, have you never owned a mobile phone? Do you have VHS tapes proudly on display? Still fax? Spend more time on a ZX Spectrum than the PS3? Maybe you have more understandable techie concerns -- like refusing to upgrade to DAB radio, HD TV or Blu-ray? If so, why?

I'd love to hear what outmoded equipment people are still using, particularly if there's a valid reason for doing so (like the argument vinyl's better than CD because the audio's not compressed.) If you care to share, then leave a comment below.

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[SPOILERS] If the self-sacrificed Al only knew Celia by her first name, how the hell did a postman manage to deliver his suicide note to Celia's home address? I'm very close to ditching FlashForward from regular reviews now, although I'll probably continue watching while biting my clenched fist, because I like to see things through to their end. I'm a glutton for punishment, yes. After the season high last week, we're back with a frustrating and dumb episode here, sad to say...

It's an episode where we're asked not to laugh when Simon (Dominic Monaghan*) asks Lloyd (Jack Davenport) to play Texas Hold 'Em poker to decide whether or not they should tell the world their experiment resulted in the blackout that killed 20 million people. The script tried to make it feel weighty and dramatic, by equating it to Gods playing games to decide mortal's fates, but it just didn't wash. It was just a silly idea. Even worse, after Lloyd wins he immediately admitted that he cheated with sleight of hand, but Simon lets the win stand? Huh? Re-match, surely.

Aaron's (Brian F. O'Byrne) "dead" daughter Tracy (Genevieve Cortese) is back and very much alive -- though minus half a leg -- with a story about witnessing a US contract army called Jericho slaughter an Afghan village, prompting the blue-on-blue attack on her Humvee that forced her into hiding these past few years. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to guess that Jericho** are probably the burly soldier-types with three-star tattoos that Mark (Joseph Fiennes) and Dem (John Cho) spend this episode trying to catch, but FlashForward thinks that it does.

Questions of free will vs. determinism were bandied around, as the whole world has latched onto Al's suicide as irrefutable proof the future can be altered or avoided. But, y'know, some people still act like it can't be changed, or choose to believe that it can't, because otherwise there's no drama. Here, Mark decides to shoot a tattooed man he thinks may be one of the mask-wearing goons that stormed the FBI building in his flashforward; and Janis (Christine Woods) researched sperm donors to fulfill her prophecy, despite her injuries making childbirth nigh impossible.

It's becoming a struggle to review this show now. Interesting things do happen, but they're usually followed by something counteractively stupid. The premise is robust enough to keep me interested to see how things develop, but I'm beginning to hate how the FBI agents tend to be waiting around for leads to fall into their laps. And when they are actually investigating things through traditional means, it's never very plausible -- here, we're supposed to believe a monochrome security camera from the other side of a football stadium would have enough resolution for image experts to enhance details on a suspect's ring? No, sorry, even 24 would struggle to make that fly.

Still, most episode build towards a scene or moment to keep you on the hook like a dumb trout -- here, a bearded man received a box of rings and shot the delivery man dead. But there's a certain irritation about how FlashForward generally just reiterates the dilemma at the core of the show's premise ever week, in slightly different ways. I'm getting bored of this speculation about what the future will bring, and I'm not sure I care that much now -- particularly since Al has proven the future isn't fixed, and it seems very likely that this Jericho outfit basically used Simon and Lloyd's technology to black everyone out for a few minutes. I don't know why they'd do that, but that's my gut feeling right now. Maybe it was a weapons test to K.O enemies on the battlefield that went wrong, or the military tested a way to see the future in wartime and got more than they bargained for? Who knows. I just suspect that Simon and Lloyd aren't the real villains, they just feel culpable because they designed the "atomic bomb", so to speak.

Overall, FlashForward still has some merit to it, but it's incredibly inconsistent and frustrating a lot of the time. Mark must be one of the most vexing "heroes" on television, too; he only ever seems concerned for his marriage, which feels very selfish, until you remember that there isn't any other incentive to find the culprits behind the blackout for him. Sure, he wants to avoid his vision coming true -- but, hey, why not just avoid the FBI building on 29 April next year? The future can be changed, after all -- we know this with certainty now. As I suggested very early on in FlashForward's run, maybe if there was firm intel that another blackout was being planned, we could feel some the impetus behind this investigation as the clock ticks towards F-day.


16 November 2009
Five, 9pm

written by: Marc Guggenheim & Barbara Nance directed by: Nick Gomez starring: Joseph Fiennes (Agent Mark Benford), John Cho (Agent Demetri Noh), Brian F. O'Byrne (Aaron Stark), Courtney B. Vance (Agent Stanford Wedeck), Sonya Walger (Dr. Olivia Benford), Dominic Monaghan (Simon), Ryan Wynott (Dylan Simcoe), Genevieve Cortese (Tracy Stark), Elizabeth Rodriguez (Ingrid Alvarez), Mark Famiglietti (Mike Willingham), Julio Oscar Mechoso (Detective Rick Malchiodi), Dominic Rains (Kahmir), Erika Ringor (Harriet), Creagen Dow (Billy), Cory Blevins (Neil Parofsky),Bo Kane (High Roller #1), Sam Ingraffia (Dealer), Kent Shocknek (Hansen) & Philip Palmer (Campbell)

* Lord knows how someone so peculiar-looking wooed Lost co-star Evangeline Lilly a few years ago, but I'm glad this means I have a shot with Yvonne Strahovski. Once I star in a blockbuster epic wearing furry feet and become world-famous. Are The Hobbit auditions still on..?

** Co-creator Brannon Braga loves his US private armies, as one featured heavily in 24's seventh season. If Jon Voight turns up as the mastermind behind all of this, we can lay creative insolvency at his door.

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[SPOILERS] The fallout from Dexter (Michael C. Hall) killing an innocent man proves to be a touch subtler than many were expecting, as Dex seeks advice from fellow killer Arthur (John Lithgow), who remains oblivious to the true motives of "Kyle Butler" and how he's become an unwitting sounding-board and counselor...

Arthur is planning a lone trip to Tampa, ostensibly to participate in another Four Walls building project, but Dexter surmises he's about to start another kill-cycle earlier than expected. So, Dex convinces Arthur to let him accompany him on the job, mainly by swelling the sense of humanitarianism Arthur has in his heart, and a two-man "road trip" is soon underway. The journey proves to be quite an eye-opener for both men, as Dex admits to killing an innocent man (mistaking him for an "animal" on a hunting expedition), and the astonished Arthur finds a way to help Dex cope with his remorse by opening up about his own dreadful role in his sister's death...

An oddly invigorated Arthur took Dex to his family's old home, specifically to the bathroom where he accidentally caused his sister to slash a vital artery while showering, setting in motion the eventual suicide of his brokenhearted mother, and savage beatings at the hand of his inconsolable father than only ended when Arthur committed patricide to end his abuse (although he kept that detail vague, unaware Dex already knows these facts having researching his past already.)

With both men unburdened by sharing their secrets, the turnaround in Arthur's temperament was darkly humorous to behold (dancing jigs, regaling a family of diners with his inappropriate family history), but Dex was instead more interested in preparing "kill room" in his motel bathroom to put an end to Arthur's lifetime of twisted killing. But maybe Dexter wouldn't be quite so keen to end Arthur's days if he knew what information Deb (Jennifer Carpenter) had uncovered...

Having convinced LaGuerta (Lauren Vélez) that there's some merit to her theory that Frank Lundy's phantom "Trinity Killer" was responsible for shooting them both, she later realized that the trajectory of her gunshot wound doesn't tally with a 6'4" tall suspect -- rather, the killer would be someone quite short, which means Trinity wasn't responsible for Lundy's death after all. But if it wasn't Arthur, and it wasn't original suspect the Vacation Killer, just who was it? Fortunately, now there isn't a conflict of interest, Deb is free to take lead on the investigation into her ex-boyfriend's killer, while Angel (David Zayas) takes point on Lundy's murder.

A handful of relatively dull subplots weren't enough to spoil the episode, but they're still not really clicking. With Dexter away for a few days (pretending to be at a Tampa convention), Rita (Julie Benz) spends time with neighbour Elliot and is surprised by a frisson of attraction between. While it's a decent idea to throw some love hurdles in Rita's way, this all felt very rushed and unlikely -- mainly because Elliot was only introduced last week, so the sudden possibility of Rita cheating on her husband didn't feel likely or worthy of introduction with only four episodes to expand on. As for LaGuerta and Angel's dormant office romance erupting on an office desk (literally, I'd guess)... please, just make it stop.

The big dramatic moment of "Road Kill" was when Dex had prepared his kill room only to discover that Arthur had left the motel in secret and gone to the Four Walls construction site to commit suicide by jumping off the half-built house. His 30-year cycle of murder completed and unexpectedly cleansed of guilt, Arthur's final move was to kill himself and be buried in the coffin he'd built in his garage (as I predicted), but Dex refused to let Trinity take the coward's way out and prevented his fall -- to be helped and applauded by a group of builders.

It's now quite an intriguing relationship that's formed between the two men, as Arthur believes his destiny has been averted by Dex (who has come into his life as an instrument of God), so this rips his plan to pieces. Will he continue his usual murderous activities, believing that some higher power wants him to? Is his absolution genuine and enough to rehabilitate Arthur completely? Or will Arthur simple be free to indulge his dark urges without the specific structure imposed by his childhood trauma -- effectively becoming a wild animal Dex has accidentally taken off the leash?

Overall, "Road Kill" was very good and found some provocative ways to spin the story into new directions -- mainly with the oddity of Arthur and Dex's relationship, but also in the fact Debra's realizes she's been chasing the wrong man over Lundy's death. With regard to that revelation, is the show about to throw a new felon into the mix at such a late stage, or is the culprit someone we've already met or know about? Who would have a reason to kill Lundy? Or was it just a random shooting and mugging unconnected to the show's ongoing storylines, with the subplot now palmed off onto Angel?

Actually; how tall is Arthur's teenage son..?


15 November 2009
Showtime, 9/8c

written by: Melissa Rosenberg & Scott Reynolds directed by: Ernest Dickerson starring: Michael C. Hall (Dexter Morgan), Julie Benz (Rita Bennett), Jennifer Carpenter (Debra Morgan), Desmond Harrington (Det. Joey Quinn), Lauren Vélez (Lt. Maria Laguerta), David Zayas (Sgt. Angel Batista), Preston Bailey (Cody), Courtney Ford (Christine Hill), John Lithgow (Arthur Mitchell), Esther Paik (Mrs. Lee) & Greg Joung Paik (Mr. Lee)

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BAFTA-winning British actor Edward Woodward has died, at the age of 79. Woodward started out in theatre, but moved into television to become a household name starring in Callan. He went on to achieve over 2,000 TV credits in his career! But, he'll probably be best remembered as the pious policeman in cult horror movie The Wicker Man (1973). In the mid-'80s, the American TV series The Equalizer also brought him international fame and a Golden Globe, playing a vigilante ex-secret agent. More recently, Woodward had appeared in Hot Fuzz, The Bill and EastEnders. He died at the Royal Cornwall Hospital in Truro today, having recently battled illnesses including pneumonia. He is survived by his wife, Michelle Dotrice, and four children.

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[SPOILERS] This episode was a far more convincing standalone story than we've had from Fringe recently, partly because it's nearly impossible to dramatize mind control in a way that's boring for viewers, but mainly because there were provocative links to the show's mythology and it kept the action flowing...

This week, Fringe Division are on the tail of a two men who have kidnapped Tyler Carson (Cameron Monaghan), the teenage son of a scientist employed by Massive Dynamic. At first it appears that his kidnappers are able to evade capture by controlling the minds of authorities who try to stop their crime spree, but it later becomes clear that the unconventional "kidnappers" are themselves victims of Tyler's newfound ability to impose his will on other people...

Fringe is a very well-constructed show with high production values, so it's always a pleasure to sit back and enjoy the thrills it serves up. This episode was peppered with memorable moments -- from a group of cops being forced to kill themselves and each other, a burly customer pouring hot coffee over his own head, and Walter's (John Noble) plan to catch the kidnappers by outfitting a FBI task force with headphones channeling "alpha waves" to circumvent the effects of mind-control.

"Of Human Action" even found time to push the mythology forward in some interesting ways, both small and large. It was very interesting to see Walter finally step inside the Massive Dynamic building, marveling at its architecture and the fact it has 73 laboratories, while also realizing just how much his former lab partner William Bell has achieved on his own. Indeed, while Bell flourished and became the head of a billion dollar corporation, the equally-gifted Walter floundered in a mental institution.

Until now, I've never really considered the fact Walter would feel like such a loser when confronted by his old friend's achievements, as he's never come across as a very materialistic person. I can't wait for William and Walter to finally meet on this show now, can you? My guess is that Walter was always the real brains behind their partnership in the '70s, but William was more mentally stable and possibly cheated Walter out of his deserved fame and fortune.

The script by Glen Whitman and Robert Chiappetta managed to keep a human face on all the action, by having Walter fret about his son's safety after Peter was kidnapped by Tyler and forced to do his bidding. There was even some interesting father/son parallels sewn throughout this episode, that we weren't bludgeoned over the head by: Peter saw aspects of his younger self in Tyler, who feels insecure around his scientist father, and it turns out that Tyler's dad has been lying to his son about his mother's "death", just as Walter has kept secrets pertaining to Peter's childhood.

But for all its pace and excitement, the abiding memory of this episode will be of the twist in the denouement -- where it's revealed that Tyler is just one of many "Tylers" (clones that Massive Dynamic are mass-producing, assumedly as mind-controlling foot soldiers for the encroaching inter-dimensional war), and that this entire situation was probably a field test to see how well Tyler would do evading capture. I'm glad to see that Nina (Blair Brown) and William Bell are therefore back to being written as "villains", or at least people with a contentious view about what's necessary to save our dimension from collapse.


15 November 2009
Sky1, 10pm

written by: Glen Whitman & Robert Chiappetta directed by: Joe Chappelle starring: Anna Torv (Olivia), Joshua Jackson (Peter), John Noble (Walter), Lance Reddick (Broyles), Blair Brown (Nina Sharp), Philip Cabrita (Clerk), Peter Graham-Gaudreau (Seth Davies), Cameron Monaghan (Tyler Carson), Jasika Nicole (Astrid Farnsworth), Jacqueline Ann Steuart (Renee Davies) & John Tench (Patrick Hickey)

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[SPOILERS] It's the beginning of the end for this incarnation of Doctor Who, as the final three episodes spearheaded by Russell T. Davies and starring David Tennant are unwrapped for winter. "The Waters Of Mars" was a fairly rudimentary episode, bolstered by excellent villains and a final act that squeezed every last drop from the moral quandary The Doctor (Tennant) found himself waist-deep in...

Arriving on Mars circa 2059, The Doctor is excited to see evidence of human colonization, but upon entering Bowie Base One he soon realizes that he's stumbled into a terrible event "fixed in time" that he's forbidden to alter. Unfortunately, the inhabitants of the base, led by Adelaide Brooke (Lindsay Duncan), are infamous victims of an unexplained explosion that took their lives but helped shape the future of mankind -- primarily by inspiring Adelaide's granddaughter to become the first person to travel faster-than-light, literally launching mankind's journey into the cosmos.

As is usual for The Doctor, his arrival coincided with escalating alien malevolence; in this case, an outbreak of a Martian virus that had infected the water supply and started turning the crew into soaking wet zombies with mouths like cracked mosaic tiles, who are able to project water from their mouths and arms to infect anyone who comes into contact with the slightest drop. And they have a plan to get from the red planet to the luscious neighbouring blue planet, potentially infecting the billions of people on Earth...

The first half of "The Waters Of Mars" was breezy, formulaic stuff we're now very familiar, reminding us of various other stories in the Doctor Who's recent history -- most obviously "The Impossible Planet". There was another mélange of tolerable actors (some doing unconvincing accents), a "funny robot" called Gadget as a concession to the kids, countless foot pursuits up dark corridors, jarring musical cues, encounters with an enemy behind a porthole, and more evidence of Russell T. Davies' fascination with segways (as the aforementioned robot was turned into a makeshift version thanks to the multipurpose sonic screwdriver.)

But, it was still a very engaging first half, primarily because "The Flood" enemy were genuinely creepy creations, and the dialogue crackled between The Doctor and Adelaide. A few sequences of infected people quivering as they were drenched in water were effective and unnerving for a show skewed towards families with six-year-olds watching, too. But the real success behind "The Waters Of Mars" came in the gripping second half, when The Doctor decided to leave everyone behind to meet their doom and ensure the timeline was maintained*... only to have second thoughts when it dawned on him that, as the last of the governing Time Lords, it's really up to him how things pan out...

Interestingly, this was the first time I can remember it feeling wrong to see The Doctor valiantly try to save lives (no matter how many heroic poses the camera afforded him), and there were some beautifully-played moments in the denouement when the victorious Doctor eventually suspected he'd gone too far in altering time and saving the day. Although I'd have preferred it if The Doctor had remained oblivious to the fact the rescued Adelaide committed suicide seconds after he dropped her off on Earth, in a sacrificial attempt to keep her granddaughter's future intact.

That final scene was particularly fascinating. The Doctor now thinks of himself as a "winner" of the notorious Time War, not a "survivor"... and has a newfound desire to bend history to his will, which is obviously a dangerous attitude to have and power to wield. After all, even a Dalek (seen in a flashback to "The Stolen Earth") knew it was in everyone's best interest to let a young Adelaide live to fulfill her destiny... and you have to take a look at yourself in the mirror if a Dalek has a better moral compass, don't you?

Overall, "The Waters Of Mars" was swift and snappy with a welcome tincture of creepiness, but it wasn't until the final twenty minutes that it really started to give us something new and exciting to chew on. The horror of a Time Lord facing his own mortality and consequently losing his grip in a twisted act of benevolence was fertile ground for great drama, and the best ever evidence that The Doctor needs a human companion to keep him grounded and his judgement balanced.

It's perhaps wise of Russell T. Davies to be moving on from Doctor Who after four years, if his stories are generally starting to remind you of earlier episodes -- only with different people being imperiled by aliens with slightly different quirks -- but at least Waters Of Mars left 9.1 million of us with the impression Davies is going out on a high, by taking The Doctor's character into some captivating, darker territory come his festive swansong...


15 November 2009
BBC1/BBC HD, 7pm

written by: Russell T. Davies & Phil Ford directed by: Graeme Harper starring: David Tennant (The Doctor), Lindsay Duncan (Adelaide Brooke), Peter O'Brien (Ed Gold), Chook Sibtain (Tarak Ital), Alan Ruscoe (Andy Stone), Sharon Duncan-Brewster (Maggie Cain), Gemma Chan (Mia Bennett), Aleksander Mikic (Ulrika Ehrlich), Cosima Shaw (Steffie Ehrlich), Michael Goldsmith (Roman Groom), Paul Kasey (Ood Sigma)

* I guess nu-Who is ignoring its own mythology established in "Father's Day", where winged creatures arrived to restore damage to a timeline Rose altered. Okay, then. That always did seem stupid. But it does irritate me that Doctor Who's rules and lore are so flexible.

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Pick of the Week: "Children In Need 2009" – BBC1 @7pm

MONDAY 16th

Enid (BBC4, 9pm) Bio-drama of famous children's author Enid Blyton, the creator of Noddy and The Famous Five. Stars Helene Bonham Carter, Matthew Macfadyen, Denis Lawson & Claire Rushbrook.
The Queen In 3D (Channel 4, 9pm) Two-part documentary featuring footage of Queen Elizabeth II's coronation, in 3D. Part of Channel 4's 3D season.
I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! (ITV1, 9pm) Return of the popular celebrity jungle reality gameshow. Hosted by Ant & Dec.
Derren Brown Presents: The 3D Magic Spectacular (Channel 4, 10pm) The illusionist presents a special programme featuring magic tricks in 3D. Part of Channel 4's 3D season.
Young Butcher Of The Year (BBC3, 10.30pm) Five butchers compete to be crowned the best butcher in the land. Presented by Geoge Lamb (oh, the irony.)

TUESDAY 17th

True Stories: Which Way Home (More4, 10pm) Documentary about illegal immigrants trying to cross from Mexico into the USA.
Beaufort (BBC4, 10.30pm) Adaptation of Ron Leshern's novel about the last few months of Israel's occupation of Lebanon.
Imagine (BBC1, 10.35pm) Return of the arts and culture series, this premiere focusing on Anish Kapoor.

WEDNESDAY 18th

Nothing.

THURSDAY 19th

Children In Needs Rocks The Royal Albert Hall (BBC1, 8pm) Charity music concert put together by Take That's Gary Barlow, featuring Robbie Williams, Lily Allen, Dizzee Rascal, Peter Kay, Sir Paul McCartney, Cheryl Cole, Katherine Jenkins, Mika, Paulo Nutini, James Corden, Snow Patrol, Dame Shirley Bassey & Fearne Cotton.
Natural World (BBC2, 9pm) Wildlife documentary looking at the black mamba snake.
Confessions Of A Traffic Warden (Channel 4, 9pm) Fly-on-the-wall documentary following rookie traffic wardens.
Alan Carr: Chatty Man (Channel 4, 10pm) Series 2 of the comedian's chat show, featuring the Mighty Boosh and Mariah Carey.

FRIDAY 20th

Children In Need 2009 (BBC1, 7pm) Sir Terry Wogan, Tess Daly and Alesha Dixon co-host the annual charity telethon. Featuring sketches featuring the cast of Merlin, Casuality and Lark Rise To Candleford, a sneak preview of the next Doctor Who special, and special performances from Westlife, Taylor Swift & JLS.

SATURDAY 21st

The Greatest Ever 3D Moments (Channel 4, 9.20pm) Countdown show of weird n' wacky 3D moments from TV and film. Part of Channel 4's 3D season.

SUNDAY 22nd

Nothing.

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