Last year I got sucked into Strictly Come Dancing, by focusing on the one thing all heterosexual man should be tuning in for: the sexy ladies. It's that simple. While it's camper than a field of pink tents and the best two celeb dancers become obvious by Week 6 (meaning half the show is spent waiting for the obvious semi-final decider), you basically get to see the likes of Lilia Kopylova and Flavia Cacace wiggle their hips. And I'm sure girls are just as excited about the men, like... erm, slimy Kiwi foot-shuffler Brendan Cole.
The sixth series is about to begin, so the BBC have revealed who's taking part. As usual, I'm going to focus on the ladies here. It's not sexist, it's just a bit of fun. Straight men can enjoy SCD too, y'know...
Tall singer who found fame with M People. Great voice, big hair, not a bad body, but a bit too "manly" and scary-looking for my taste. She might be a good dancer, but I suspect not. Dance partner: Brian Fortuna.
Anton du Beke (i.e, not expected to win).
Andrew Castle, who will hopefully keep her in the competition as long as Kenny Logan did last year.
Tom Chambers from Holby City. Who?
Phil Daniels. That's what happens when you do well the previous year, see? Oh well, hopefully Flavia will show us some hot flavours for a few weeks at least.
Mark Foster, so I'd assume she'll do well because he's an athlete.
Austin Healey, a rugby player, so she'll likely be around for awhile this year.
Gary Rhodes to contend with, so I'm hoping he keeps her in the show longer than last year.
John Sergeant – who will surely be the first to go. What a crime! Have you seen Kristina? Look above. I can't find her birth year anywhere, but she's white-haired, small, well-toned and pretty sexy. John Sergeant will be in heaven. But not, alas, for long.
Don Warrington, so I'm hoping he's a dark horse and can bust a move or two. For me, SCD always take a dip when Lilia drops out of the competition. We need her spark, energy and adorable cuteness 'till the quarter-finals at least.
Strictly Come Dancing 6 starts on 13 September with a pre-show special on BBC1, but the competition really begins on 20 September.