Friday, 17 April 2009

THE APPRENTICE 5 - Week Four

Friday, 17 April 2009
A really strong episode this week, as it was a pure make-and-sell task that always churns up some great moments. Sir Alan asks the teams to manufacture and sell two beauty products containing natural ingredients, putting Noorul and Paula in charge of Ignite and Empire, respectively.

From the very start, Noorul was in trouble. He has zero leadership ability, and Ignite struggled to get creative, make decisions, or strategize with any semblance of speed or efficiency. Eventually, they settled on the half-decent idea of honey-based soap and bubble bath, with the resulting soap resembling the inside of a Crunchie that disintegrates when it comes into contact with a wet human body.

Still, it was something. Ignite rushed to sell their wares at Camden Market and were moderately successful, but elsewhere the team struggled to entice buyers (particularly Noorul, who wound up standing in a tube station dressed as a beekeeper, scaring people away.) Eventually, with so much soap unsold, Noorul was finally strong-armed into slashing prices -- £3 for two bottles at first, then £1 per bottle, and finally 30p per bottle!

Empire fared much better, really. They opted for a green seaweed-based soap and shower gel ("Rock Poole") that looked far, far more attractive than Ignite's nuclear bars. However, during the manufacturing it dawned on them (well, Nick told them before floating away) that they had confused cheap "cedarwood" with expensive "sandalwood" and misunderstood 3% as 3g when following the recipe.

This meant Empire had spent a colossal £700 on ingredients before selling had even started, forcing them to double their prices to try and recoup costs. Empire's selling day went much better than Ignite's (Ben was especially good), but would their hard work be enough to cover their error?

In the boardroom, Sir Alan revealed that Ignite made a profit of £493.97, but Empire lost by £68.04 because of their £700 overspend. As Nick pointed out, if Empire hadn't used sandalwood, they would actually have won with a £590 profit margin. So, despite the fact Empire clearly had the better product and the best experience selling to punters, their basic error cost them the whole task. It was a hollow victory for Ignite, really (although Noorul seemed happy), and they were rewarded with a trip to a Japanese restaurant to make and eat sushi.

Red-haired Project Manager Paula brought Yasmina and Ben into the boardroom with her, as they were her designated people in charge of finances. Irish Ben did his utmost to shift the blame somewhere else, claiming he may have been delegated to help with costing, but circumstances prevented him from being too involved. Yasmina was more culpable (certainly based on the TV evidence of her slip-up), but Sir Alan eventually decided that Paula should have spotted the obvious error and must take responsibility for that mistake. Ben almost talked himself into a firing, but it seems that his selling ability (admitted by Yasmina) saved him.

Did the right person go? Well, no. It felt to me that Sir Alan was getting rid of Paula because he saw more potential in Yasmina and Ben based on their performance in earlier weeks. Strictly based on this task, I'd have fired Yasmina -- she was most involved with the costing and made the fatal error. Of course, this was one of those weeks where the worst team became victorious thanks to a fortunate blunder, as Noorul was definitely the biggest waste of space in the boardroom. Nice guy, but he looked totally lost and out of his depth throughout. Ignite got into profit despite Noorul's leadership and because of the hard graft everyone put in shifting luminous bricks.


15 April 2009
BBC1, 9pm