Director: Elodie Keene
Cast: Courteney Cox (Lucy Spiller), Ian Hart (Don Konkey), Jeffrey Nordling (Brent Barrow), Laura Allen (Julia Mallory), Josh Stewart (Holt McLaren), Alex Breckenridge (Willa McPherson), Johann Urb (Johnny Gage), Vincent Gallo (Sammy Winter), Julie Claire (Cheryl Steen), Owiso Odera (Gareth Dasilva), Ivonne Coll (Maria (The Cleaning Lady), Mini Anden (Holt's Co-Star) & Ankur Bhatt (Kenny)
A washed-up 80s television star takes the DirtNow office hostage and forces Lucy's staff to put him on the next front cover...This episode should have been a lot of fun, as the premise seems ready-made for Dirt's faintly ridiculous style, but sadly it's one of the season's most uneven and misfiring storylines.
One problem is that it has no major link to any of the ongoing plots, which is disappointing. But, even taken as an informal break from normality, This Is Not Your Father's Hostage Situation is as ungainly as its title. Another problem is that most of the episode's emotional weight rests on characters only introduced here; from hostage-taker Sammy Winter (Vincent Gallo), a has-been 80s TV star who blames Lucy for his career nosedive, to the sudden introduction of a straight-talking Cleaning Lady (Ivonne Coll) and film star Johnny Gage (Johann Urb).
A pivotal moment for one of DirtNow's supporting characters, Kenny (Ankur Bhatt), also lacks bite because we haven't grown to know or care about any of Lucy's journalists, beyond Willa (Alex Breckrenridge). Writer David Flebotte tries to offset this problem with a hastily written moments of flirting for Kenny to engage in, but that flags up his demise to the TV-savvy. Still, it was worth it just so someone could scream "oh my god, they killed Kenny!" Well, nearly.
Sadly, Willa and her shifty lover Brent (Jeffrey Nordling) spend the whole episode cowering in a cupboard, having their relationship critiqued by the aforementioned Cleaning Lady, quite bizarrely. It's a waste of two characters, especially as it leaves only Lucy and Don (Ian Hart) to confront Winter with any degree of success. I particularly liked Don's guard dog mentality whenever he senses Lucy's in danger, though.
While the idea of the news happening to the newsmakers is interesting, the juicy prospect of a hostage crisis in a tabloid magazine is never made particularly tense. After a shocking start, Winter himself becomes quite amenable for much of the episode, and his demands are more humorous than untenable. In fact, his demand for tabloid glory comes moments after DirtNow loses its latest cover story, so his timing couldn't be better for Lucy's magazine!
Elsewhere, there are a few nice scenes between Holt (Josh Stewart) and Julia (Laura Allen), as they settle back into their lives post-rehab. That really must have been an intensive program Julia was on, eh? These scenes are only really notable for Holt's inability to show emotion toward the crisis at DirtNow, as mistress Lucy is put in harm's way.
Overall then, this episode fails on many levels, but mostly because too many new characters are introduced and thrown into formulaic chaos. We never care about Sammy Winter's predicament, as his spiral into obscurity isn't fleshed out beyond a few bad 80s photos and talk of TV show Buster Rules.
The script also shoots itself in the foot by neutering two of the show's best characters (Brent and Willa) in a cupboard, whilst trying to belatedly make you care about two-dimensional characters like Kenny. The passage of time is also badly shown by the script, as events take place over three days, but it feels like three hours.
A nice idea, poorly executed.
3 September 2007
FiveUS, 9.00 pm
